Choose Your Suffering

A pretty view during a recent bike ride around Shawnee Lake

A Subtle Art

In Mark Manson's book, The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck, he presents a counter intuitive approach of looking at life.  For some it may work.  It worked for me last weekend. Here is how it works.

We all suffer on some level. In fact, life can be alternatively viewed as just a long time of unavoidable suffering.  With each decision you make, you choose some level of suffering. 

Earlier last week, I was informed of the Buffalo Bill Century Ride in Leavenworth, KS.  The ride had 25, 60, and 100 mile road options, along with a 50 mile gravel ride. The 60 and 100 mile rides grabbed my interest.  

When the weekend came, I was under no obligation to choose to get up at 5:45am to get ready and travel to Leavenworth to begin riding 60 or 100 miles at 8:00am.  I could have chosen a lesser form of suffering.  Sitting on the couch, reading, studying, or maybe watching some TV could have been my choices.  I only would have suffered my own feeling of guilt for not having taken advantage of such an adventure. 

I chose a higher level of suffering, because that was easier in my mind. I would suffer the open roads of eastern Kansas.  

Along the route, there was a fork in the road. To choose right would mean only 60 miles, and to be done with the ride in a more reasonable time frame. To choose left would mean a commitment to 100 miles, and more suffering.  I chose left.  

The pains that one goes through in a 100 mile ride are really not all that bad when compared to other forms of discomfort. I'll take the swollen underside over a guilty conscience. I will take the sore quads and aching back over the simple discomfort of more decisions that would need to be made in a normal day (like, what beer I should have next? Or, should I leisure read longer or take a break and do some push-ups? Perhaps I should go to the library and rent some movies.) 

For me, framing it in terms of suffering helped me get out there and on my bicycle.  I like to have a full calendar, and to schedule each moment of my day.  This requires a lot of decisions, and as such, a small amount of suffering. I didn't want that suffering.  I wanted the decision free kind of suffering of an increasingly stiffening neck and shoulders as the day wore on.

The next time you need to make a decision on doing something difficult, you might give this method of framing your decision in terms of suffering a try. 

Pushing a 2 Ton Baby Giant on a Swing

You can't push all at once. Use the momentum of the swing, silly!

Imagine a 2 ton baby giant on a swing, and it is crying at you to push her.  You feel obliged since it could possibly crush you with a swat of her arm.

Although difficult, when your hard pushes are timed just right, the giant will begin to swing higher and higher. However, it takes quite a mighty push, and it takes a mighty push at a specific time during the swing. Specifically, on the apex of its back swing. 

Learning Something New and Very Difficult

When you are first learning something that is really hard to grasp, it will take a lot of your time. In fact, it better take some of your time every day. Otherwise, you will lose what you've gained. 

Say you want to pass a class with an A. That is equivalent to getting the baby giant up to some high level on her swing. Trying to cram everything in the night before the test is like pushing the baby giant to that level with one push.  It isn't going to happen.  

If we think as each swing forward and back as a day, then we can reach that A level with a timely push every day. Skipping a push, and the giant will quickly lose its momentum and it will take an extra day to get back on track.  

A quick review of notes is the equivalent of giving a simple maintenance push, that will keep the giant at her same level. Anything extra, and you can gain a little more toward your goal. 

This idea came to me while listening to a similar analogy in Mind Hacking by Sir John Hargrave on my way back and forth to work. I hope it provides an avenue for you to hack your own mind, and perhaps conquer that difficult challenge that looms in front of you. 

Application

As an avid reader, I often ask myself what is the purpose of reading so much if I'm not going to apply what I read.  For example, the book Give and Take by Adam Grant outlines the benefits of giving to others. Here are a few ways in which you can give:

• Nominate someone for an award.
• Download all the birthdays of friends into your phone and set reminders to send physical birthday cards.  
• When traveling, send postcards to friends and family.
• Volunteer for duties that need done.  
• Follow through with friendly inquiries.  

When books are read that are not in a personal improvement category, look for parts that you can write about and share with others. This is how one can "apply" that knowledge. 

Books of fiction are for entertainment. You can "apply" these books by smiling, laughing, or simply being amazed.  Then one can tell of their experience to others. If this application isn't possible, then the book should probably not be finished.  

Application may not be that important to you. There are a few camps of mathematicians: those that enjoy the pureness of mathematics, and those that don't see the point unless it can be applied.  Even the purest of mathematics will have an application someday in the distant future.  It is good to keep that in mind when you're reading, even if you're enjoying it for enjoyment's sake.